In your email you talked about love. Mom thank you for loving me unconditionally. I remember when I was younger and I would ask if you would still love me if I failed my school exam...it's such a silly thing to ask...but at the same time it's something really special and important to know that your mom loves you unconditionally. It's really sad, but there's some kids that don't have that in their homes. I'm grateful to have been born to parents as loving, kind, and all around amazing as you two. 

This week has been really hard...we haven´t been able to work like normal. This transfer has been really emotionally trying. Sometimes I struggle with knowing whether or not the lack of success is my fault, but when I think about the good things that have happened it makes me know that we really have seen success. I really am trying to be the best that I possibly can. It's just hard to go for so long without seeing progression with our numbers. But the mission really isn't all about numbers it's about people and helping them even when it's your companion that needs help. 

I am coming close to the year mark. It's really crazy. I´m almost two thirds of the way through this crazy adventure. I feel like I have really grown so far. I know that I still have so much to learn, but I'm grateful for what I've already experienced. 

I´m starting to wonder about what I´ll do with my future-- if I´ll finish getting my elementary education degree or if I'll choose another major; If I'll extend my mission and then apply to another school or just start working. It's hard to know what's around the corner but it seems like my best option for my personal life would be continuing with BYUI. It really makes the most sense, but I´m definitely aware that there are many other options that I could choose. I'm starting to become unsure if I want to be an elementary school teacher...but I'm not really sure what else I would do. I feel like maybe I've lost my chances as far as music goes and I'm not sure if I would continue with that. I enjoy reading and writing but I don't have a real passion for that. Really I have no idea what career choice to choose. Knowing me what do you think would suit me just right? 

So now for a brief update on this week... 

Monday the zone had an activity where they went to see a waterfall and gardens..from what I understand. We didn't go because we were worried about my companion's health. Also the bishop told her that she can't leave the house until Wednesday.

Tuesday we had divisions with the Zellas aka hermana leaders. I worked in my area with one of them while the other stayed in the house with my companion. It was really hard because the whole time I was thinking and worrying about my companion...really hard. 

Wednesday we went to the bishop's house. I taught his daughter piano lessons. After that we went tracting in part of our area. We found two potential families that we could teach. We´ll see what comes from that. 

Thursday a member (our lunch Mom) helped us learn more about the members and how to find them and who lives in Doleguita. We found a less active member. We got to know our area more. We had a group night in the church in the evening. 

Friday my companion was struggling and we stayed in the house until 5:30 when we went to have a meeting with our mission leader and the bishop and the other hermanas in the ward. 

Saturday my companion was having issues again. We didn't leave the house until 4:30 when we went to talk to the bishop and he was able to help us out. After talking to him there was the valentine's activity. 

Sunday F. came to church, his baptism was announced. We had another meeting with the bishop and our mission leader so we were at the church until 4:30. Then we went to have linner with a member. After that we went back to the house to do weekly planning. 

Monday, today, on the way to the store we passed F. He was smoking. That was pretty hard and I felt like I hit a brick wall. I'm not really sure what we can do. He's progressing but he keeps having these fall backs. I really love him and want to be able to help him but I'm not sure what else we can do for him.

Another crazy week here in Panama. 

I'm feeling happy and hopeful. 

In two weeks we have transfers so we´ll see what happens. There's a good chance that I´ll be sent to another area with a new companion since I've been here in Doleguita for so long. 

I sent letters today so people keep a look out! haha 

Lots of love, 

Hermana Hannah Koehler